The Hippo and Snuffles Show

2012-02-14T10:43:00.006-05:00

Baby love

Happy Valetines Day! I have to admit to having mixed feelings about Valetine's day, and our celebration of it is very low-key. We baked heart shaped sugar cookies yesterday, and flour ended up all over. Pizza likes to play and dig in the flour with the measuring cups, and I generally let him. And then he wanted to "clean" the dishes which really means he wants to play in soapy water. He was having fun, and the mess wasn't so awful. You can't expect your kitchen to stay clean if you back with a four year-old,but I fully understand why my mom never made sugar cookies with us!

There has been a whole lot of baby love going around, what with all of my younger cousin having babies this spring. So another pebble vest was finished, and for my own my very first baby suprise jacket.

First the completed pebble in knitpicks swish DK. It took 1 50 gram ball, but it was very, very close at the end. I finished it with orange buttons, and Yogurt modelled for me. I'm hoping it will still be useful although the baby is a late spring baby, so non winter months, not sure if it will be.It is cute, and an expression of crafty love. I also sewed together a ribbon/tag blanket like a made for Yogurt, but I didn't take a picture.

Second, the EZ Baby Suprise Jacket for Yogurt in sheperd's wool. The yarn is greener than it looks in these pictures. I was suprised at how quick this knit up. It took me about two weeks, and I'm a slow knitter. I messed up the stitch count at the end, so it isn't picture perfect like it should be, but you have to know what it's suppose to look like to tell, and it is still very functional.

This leaves me with nothing on the needles. I am at a pause considering what to do next. There are more baby showers coming, and existing babies who did not get something yet. And Pizza wants me to knit him a sweater..... Meanwhile I trying to make some baby pants for Paul on the sewing machine. The first real non square item I've tried to make in a long time. We shall see....

2012-02-07T09:54:00.006-05:00

Scribble-Scrabble and Mega baby blankets

Pizza (who is 4) is not fond of drawing. I attribute this to a perfectionistic streak in his personality. He did not walk until he was darn sure he wouldn't fall. Same with potty training. He does not like to draw because he can't make it look like he wants it to look, and no amount of cajoling from me is going to change that. But since "All" kids draw ( look it up), I try to build up his confidence and work with him.

So we go to a princess birthday party this weekend for one of his classmates, and they have a craft table, and for the boys there are littlewooden pirate ships with tiny markers to color. Because there wasn't much for Pizza to do while the little girls got make-up (yeah, don't even get me started on that!), I encouraged him to work on his. He does this:

Another mother observing this says to him. "Why don't you color that? That's only scribble." To which Pizza most apolegetically replies " I only know how to scribble-scrabble. I can't color." and immediately loses all interest in what he is doing. Needless to saw I felt awful for the little man, and shot the women a dirty look, and told him his work what fine, but to no avail.

Arghhh.... It has prompted me to re-examine what to do with Pizza. He needs confidence in his ability. I'm pretty sure this is not a fine motor issue, because he is quite good with other things that involve his hands and fingers. He can do buttons and zippers, and plays with lego, and is good a tracing letters with his fingers. But right now I'm scared to make him draw, so I decided another type of craft which will work with fine motor, rather then drawing per se would be good for him. Something he can display and feel good about. So we are working with a sign for his bedroom door. I drew his name while he watched, and applied glue, and I let him set to work with the beans. He even did a pattern! He came up with that idea all on his own. We got through S last night, and we will work on it for small amounts of time until he finishes. Then I will have him practice tracing his letters, and maybe try to coax him into fingerpaitning his name. If he does that maybe, maybe I will ask him to write his name with a crayon.....

On my crafty end I set up my sewing spot( why can't I ever remeber how to thread the bobbin on my machine!), and managed to sew a mega swaddling, baby blanket for Yogurt, who is quite long for his age. It's a bit overkill, but it has to do with making me feel like I'm doing something to address the sleeping issue, and less to do with the actual reality that it won't make a bit of difference.

I made progress on the BSJ, but I don't like the way the increases are looking, and haven't decided whether to rip out that section and try for the third time or just live with it. First I tried M1, but I didn't like it. Then I tried a bar increase, and that's better, but I think there must be another way to increase in garter stitch.

Hope you creating is going well, and sorry about the tangent on my son's craft. That women's careless comment has really been on my mind.

frontier dreams

2012-02-03T08:42:00.002-05:00

in this moment

holding him and listening to his breathe softly rise and fall veins visible on his eyelids. I can't help but marvel at how fast he grows. and then he stirs, the moments gone.

2012-01-31T09:56:00.006-05:00

A time to create

Ha, Ha, that's a funny title isn't it. As if......

Yogurt isn't sleeping so well these days. It's that darn left hand that wakes him up every night, and the rolling onto the belly, which is cute during the day, but no so much at night. And the napping in my lap, which I love, but I got to get him back to napping on something of a schedule and in his crib, or I'm going to be in a sorry state. Especially as the other one may be on the verge of giving up his naps in the afternoon.

But despite all this and some other stuff going on here, I have been steadily knitting when given the oppurtunity to ignore my motherly duties.

Can you guess? Baby suprise jacket in Sheperd's wool, color seabreeze, knitting an 5 st/ inch to fit Yogurt for awhile I hope

Nicki Lohr's Pebble vest, for an upcoming baby shower. Knit with swich DK in bark for knitpicks. It looks small, but so was Yogurt's and it is still fitting him at 4 months even though he is a biggish baby. It sort of stretches as they grow, and the buttons on the side give it a little give.

Then there is the matter of the gigantic swaddling blanket to be made from four existing swaddling blankets, to keep the left had in check at night.,, but that is for this week if I can find time and space to set up for some sewing .

Shots of the boys from our walk to the park this weekend.

Gotta keep on craftin on...

frontier dreams

2012-01-02T21:32:00.002-05:00

Intentions

I have many good and gracious ideas, but I have a hard time following through on them. This year I will try and do a little better, about setting goals, and following through, and well see if I get anywhere by the end. Happy 2012!

2011-12-21T21:55:00.004-05:00

everyday miracles, seen and unseen

My new camera improves my pictures many times over, but doesn't make up for the fact that I am mostly unapologetically a messy person. Hannukah is here and we celebrate it mostly to remember where we come from as a family. But I didn't grow up celebrating it, so we are winging it, and feeling our way through making up our new traditions.

It isn't really suppose to be a present holiday, but the nana, and our aunts, and the cousins, supply us with gifts a plenty. This year the whining got to me, and I decided to let Pizza (aka 4 year old) open his gifts first night, so I wouldn't have to hear it anymore. In a way this is good as it gets them out of the way so the subsequent nights can be a little more low key. And indeed this seemed to work.

First night was a pain, and I found myself swearing I wouldn't be celebrating this holiday next year. I cooked a big dinner, well a chicken and latkes. For the unintiated latkes are a bit of a pain, shredding potatoes, wringing the water out of them as best you can, shredding onions, mix in a little egg and matzo meal, form sortof like you might make a hamburger (wringing out still more excess moisture), and gently, ever so gently, place in hot oil. They turned out great this year, but it takes a long time to make, Pizza isn't so excited about the meal anyway, Yogurt was hungry and a little cranky because I couldn't pay attention to him. In short I could really use an extra hand around when I making them to keep the kids entertained (weeknight= husband at work til late no matter what). So maybe next year we will hold off the big meal until a weekend. Anyway we got through it, ate dinner a little late, lite candles, and finished opening presents somewhere in the middle.

Second night was much simpler and more to my liking. The pictures are from this night. Reheated soup, chicken nuggets (for pizza), and latkes (for me). We lit the candles, made up a prayer, all before daddy came home. We also opened up yogurt's presents, and found a couple extra ones for pizza I didn't realize we had (thank's Nana).

I'm envisioning much the same, except our hannukah treat will be doughnuts, even though I'm very tempted to make more latkes, because they were very good. And then onwards to Christmas smack dab in the middle of all this merriment this year!

2011-12-06T21:34:00.001-05:00

Reflections

Listening to christmas carols sung by Kathleen Battle, and contemplating.......

We are a very secular household, mistrustful of organized religion for the ill it has brought to the world, and the ill it still brings to the world. The wars, the nauseting way political figures in this country thumb their bibles, and sell out their souls for power, the use of religion for justification of some many stupid and injustice things.....

and yet....listening to this very religious music, this very spiritual music, floods me with a sense of hope, love, and the grand possibilties of humanity when we open our hearts to the ideals imbodied in the Christmas story itself.

Afterall it is the story of one small family's journey through an unjust world. The love of family prevailing over this injustice, with the help of strangers: the inkeeper who finds shelter for the expectant mother as her time draws near, the sheperds who come to celebrate the child's birth, the maji who bring gifts. Those who one might imagine help shelter the baby from Herod's madness.

It is also about the special possibility and hope that babies bring to world. That the baby born in poverty can grow up to be one who changes the world.

It is about a mother and father's love for their child, the waiting for the baby to be born which is a magical and transforming time for anyone who goes through it.

It is about birth and life and love, and the cycle that envelopes us all and connects us to one another.

The problem for me is how to convey these feelings about humanity and its capacity for goodness into our holiday celebration.

2011-11-11T08:54:00.001-05:00

Moving Forward

Something took a big bite out of our jack-o-latern (a deer?),paul sleeps alot, we managed to order and receive our backyard playground,and that elusive smile which is hard to capture, though he smiles all the time, and blows bubbles.

Moving forward, pulling off a birthday party, with two weeks planning.

2011-11-02T09:12:00.002-04:00

October

October has come and went.

The blurring of time continues.

But it's not bad, not really.

The days have taken on a dream like quality as I try to be "in the moment" and not in the haze of feedings, and diaper changes, and toddler demands. always at the worst possible time.

But my boys are wonderful.

2011-10-16T16:01:00.000-04:00

One Month!

2011-10-10T09:03:00.002-04:00

3 Weeks

2011-10-03T08:48:00.003-04:00

2 Weeks

2011-09-23T09:37:00.002-04:00

One Week

2011-09-01T10:49:00.002-04:00

Almost Ready

I bought the fabric for this project way back in March, just before we started showing the old house and I had to put my sewing stuff in deep storage. I finally found time to put together a sewing space (the living room, which has excellent natural light) and sew the dern thing.

Deep breath. I am almost ready to met this little guy who has been kicking up a storm in my belly since I was 16 weeks!It is now coming down to just a handful of things (carseats, second rocking chair, children's tylenol, wash breast pump just in case, nephew's birthday party.....)But the important thing, this blanked I so wanted to give to my little one is done!

2011-08-29T09:39:00.003-04:00

Hmmm....

37 weeks!

Trying to spend the last little bit of time before Yogurt's arrival enjoying the days with my little boy. It is a little sad that the days of me and my little guy are at an end, and soon it will be me and my little guys, or my big guy and my little guy, however you want to think of it.

With this is mind, we took a 3 day weekend staycation with the focus on doing stuff with the little guy. It started with a Friday morning trip to the Montgomery County Ag Fair, and a visit to the tractors. He has been talking about this since I took him (by myself because JC sprained his ankle that morning) last year. "When is the fair open? Can we go to the fair?" It has really been pretty constant, which is suprising. I guess it made quite an impression on him.

The boy loves the tractors, skid loaders, lawn mowers, and the combine harvester! And the tractor ride from the parking lot. Not so much into the animals, but he did pet a goat or two.

And we went to the National Zoo for the first time all summer to see the baby lions, which aren't so little anymore! And we went to IKEA, and Cabin John, and found a new park in Rockville. It was a nice weekend. We haven't had one like that in a good long while.

Then there was the earthquake, and the hurricane which thankfully just busted up one of our last weekends BB, and didn't really make itself too much of a nuisance. Although I did scoop the little guy out of his bed at the height of the winds howling and plop him inbetween us. Just feel safer knowing I can grab him quickly if need be, even if that sentiment is completely illogical. At some point in the night he sort of woke up and looked at me with a big smile on his face. He likes being in bed with us, but we don't allow it often.

So we are down to our last little bit of quiet before the baby arrives, and while I'm looking forward to the new arrivial, I'm going to miss these days a little bit too. I'm trying to spend as much time enjoying with the little guy as I can because these days are fleeting too.

2011-08-15T09:47:00.003-04:00

A time to finish up, and start anew

I looked at my calender this weekend. Guess what I'm 35 weeks pregnant, not 34! I'm missing a whole week now! And wow, there is a big mental difference between 34 and 35. 35 is starting to be in that range of it could happen anytime!

With that in mind last weekend I knitted the pebble vest by Nikol Lohr( pebble) and this weekend I actually finished it!

I also finished the tiny tea leaves by Melissa La Barre ( tiny tea leaves) for my niece. I had finished knitting this months ago, back when it was cold, but because of all the house selling, moving, nonsense I never had the patience to sew in the ends and get buttons. Yes it's knit in the same yarn as the vest (knitpicks Swish DK, delft heather). I like this sweater alot, and it will make a nice big girl sweater for my niece. I just hope it fits in the shoulders and sleeves. I'm worried the sleeves might be too tight.

I'm trying to squeeze some more baby knitting in, and a have a pair of socks for myself I would like to finish before baby arrival, and I think I need to come up with a nice sweater for the little guy too, because he sees me knitting all this stuff for the baby, and I don't want him to get jealous, and I want to work on my long hibernating DC blanket, and a mitre squared blanket for the baby. Hmmm... I think I have the knitters version of nesting: The stuff in the house, the nursery, that can all wait, i just feel like knitting. And there is that taggy blanket project..... maybe I need to set up my sewing area at least!

2011-08-10T10:25:00.003-04:00

We got rhythm??

Inspired by a blog I recently started reading (http://frontierdreams.blogspot.com/), and by some issues that started cropping up around our home, we are trying to establish a routine in our household. The idea is to help the 3.5 year old feel a little more secure and maybe cut down on some of the whining, and tantruming that had started to creep into our daily existence.

This summer has been one of transition for our family. We packed up one household, moved to hotel for a month, and have since been setting up in the new house. In addition I am 33 weeks pregnant, and the pregnancy has taken a toll on my patience and energy level. The routines we had (which weren't that good to begin with) completely feel apart for awhile, and we ate out a whole lot, got a lot of take out, got into the habit of going somewhere almost ever afternoon. Now that we are in the house and setting up, I have started to cook real food again, and seemed like it was time to start reigning in some of the chaos. I wanted to do this to help the little guy adjust and feel secure in the new house, but what I'm finding is that it helps me probably as much as it helps the little guy.

I guess the other thing to point out is that I am also really still trying to figure out the whole stay-at-home mom thing. I worked full time the first 2.5 years of the little guys life, and some of our bad habits stem from the exhaustion of that period of our life.

The little guy wakes up slowly. I go into his room around 7:15 and say good morning, I try tickling him, and sit and talk a little. Then he gets up, walks down stairs, plops on the couch, and watches TV, usually Dinosaur Train, for a half hour while he wakes up. I drink coffee.

Breakfast is a tricky meal for us. The little guy is picky. I have never been a big breakfast eater, and this doesn't help the little guy. We used to just eat breakfast on the couch while watching TV. This is a bad habit from my working days. Now we are trying to turn off the TV at 8:00 and go over to the dining room table and sit down together, even with daddy if he doesn't have to be in to the office early, and eat something. Still working on meals that work, but this has always been tricky for us. We do this for about fifteen minutes.

Then we march upstairs to get dressed and brush our teeth. Again this was something we used to do sitting on the couch during the morning crunch. To get him to do this a bribe him by with ten minutes of play time before herding him into the car to get to nursery school in time. He stays in nursery school til noon.

We are a week into the new routine, and it seems to be working. The little guy is taking some pride in getting dressed, and the whining has been minimal. We shall see if he simple gets bored, but I hoping that establishing this now will help us weather the arrival of the baby, by giving the little guy something to help him help us get him ready for school everyday.

2011-07-31T07:01:00.004-04:00

Moving

Old kitchen, fun with flour, hotel while we wait, new house, new kitchen

Not much difference in the state of my kitchen before and after our migration

We will be putting away boxes forever.

2011-07-18T09:53:00.002-04:00

we (and our stuff)are in the new house!

and although there is lots of work to do, and a measure of dreaming and plotting of improvements, I feel like a should sit back for a moment.

I wish I could grab a cold beer, but alas!

somehow we pulled it off!

we sold the old house in a down market, bought the new house, did some renovations to clean it up a little, and moved.

and somehow (and with some help from the movers ) we sorted and packed And moved all our stuff

and learned to appreciate how little we need.

but man, our little guy was so happy to be reunited with all his old toys!

(pictures soon)

2011-07-08T15:23:00.002-04:00

Sold the old house.

Moved out.

Waiting in a hotel for the new house to be painted, floored, aired.

All while creeping closer to yogurt's arrival.

One crazy summer.

We will make it. just a little farther.....almost there.

The mantra playing in my head......

It will be worth it in the end, right?

2011-05-17T09:38:00.003-04:00

Hello?

(Me on Mother's day)

I find myself in mid-May having not written in this public journal since January. It isn't like there hasn't been bloggable stuff going on. Quite the contrary, maybe things have been just a little too bloggable, and I thought better of posting any of it until things quiet down. And then there is that finding time thing, and the slowness of yeah old laptop, and my general impatience.

Let's see....We went on vacation to Sanibel island. We had lots of work done on our house. My husband changed jobs. And I am 22 weeks pregnant, and have had an interesting time of it so far. That is all I want to say for now. Maybe I can get back into the routine of archiving our little life, maybe not. But I'm glad that it is Spring, and soon will be Summer!

2011-01-31T09:01:00.002-05:00

A near thing

We almost moved to Chicago, but we didn't. It was close.

I realized that I would follow my husband anywhere if it would make him happier. just as long as we were all together.

We lost power for two days, and I (my husband actually) threw away everything in the fridge and the freezer. Then I scrubbed the heck out of the fridge. It just seemed like the appropriate thing to do. so much for my new year's resolution!

I'm feeling tired and nauseous all the time. It wasn't like this last time. I think I'm going to be saying that a lot over the next couple of years.

2011-01-11T14:32:00.002-05:00

Resolution

This year has greeted us with little resolution, so a thought I would share mine

1. Waste less food. (without making anyone sick)

2. Use less paper towels, plastic bags, and plastic water bottles.

3. Put some batteries in the camera, so the blog has pictures.

4. Finish Anna's sweater.

Mostly in line with being conscious of what we consume that we don't need to, to be kinder to the earth, and kinder to our bank accounts. I made some progress on #2 last year, but I still forget the shopping bags on occasion, or forget that I can use them in a non grocery store as well. I have switched to use cloth diapers for rags in the kitchen, which adds to the laundry, but not appreciable. However some messes are paper towel kind of messes. I also use crocheted or knitted cotton dishrags instead of sponges, and throw them in with the laundry. They work better for the most part anyway.

The food thing I've been working on, but it is a challenge. My eyes are often bigger than our ability to eat, or my desire to prepare food at the end of the week. But I'm working on it. I still need to figure out when to freeze part of a meal for later, and when we are okay eating that meal all week. Maybe I should er toward freezing. But what's the best way to freeze?Will it stand up? I don't like freezing food in general, because it often gets ruined in the process. I think part of the not wasting might be making smaller more frequent grocery trips. So that I don't plan two meals and only cook one, and then lose the produce for the second one. It may mean eating in more on weekends, which we generally don't do. It is a complicated problem. But I think we can do better.

Now off to work on #4

2011-01-03T08:45:00.003-05:00

Happy New Year

The arrival of the New Year means the end of the crazy bustle of the month and a half surrounding the Holidays. I am sitting alone in a quiet house for the first morning in weeks. We had a great Holiday. Each year seems to get better and better, and we are enjoying making our new traditions as a family.

This year greats us poised for great changes. One change will make me extremely sad if it happens, another potential change will make me extremely happy. Combined together they are extremely daunting, but maybe it is time. Maybe we have gotten too comfortable and we need this to keep living.

And with alot left unsaid, I will leave for the moment. And promise as I do every year to get back to this space more often.

2010-12-06T08:41:00.005-05:00

This time of year a whirl of activity descends on our household and we seem to jump from celebration to celebration. Enjoy the chaos!

My little boy turned three, and he was feted, and feted, and feted again, culminating in the spectacular party this weekend at our house. Kids, sugar, guitars, the fire brigade running through my house with every vacuum house I could muster up = Complete and blissful chaos only little kids can create! The hose seemed so still when everybody left! Oh yeah, and then there is this Hanukkah thing that we now celebrate as he is old enough to sortof get "it". The early arrival of Hanukkah this year means that there is a two week period in which he gets toys almost everyday. I fear he will go into withdraw waiting for Christmas. Enjoy this beautiful, busy season, and try not to get too caught up in what you HAVE to do, so you can enjoy what you are doing right now!

2010-11-10T10:08:00.002-05:00

Halloween

I never knew Halloween could be som fun: Pumpkin carving, pumpkin seeds, pumpkin farm with nursery school, and trick or treating. We did it all, and the three year got it! What a difference a year makes!

2010-10-27T08:57:00.005-04:00

These knits deserve better

The beginning of fall has been spent playing fire-fighters, learning to make a decent loaf, cooking, and knitting.

The knits deserve better pictures, but it was humid, hot, and rainy this morning, so this is the best I could do for now.

They are Frost Diamonds and Tea-leaves cardi . There is a 3rd thing I've completed.

It is a self design. I'm very proud of it. I knit it at the beach, and don't have a finished picture yet.

Have a Rockin' Halloween everybody!!!

2010-10-11T08:33:00.002-04:00

Well, I've come to it. I have told my boss that I have done what I can for the paper. I am no longer working on a paper. I will soon no longer be able to hid behind working on that paper, like the paper was the one thing keeping me from being a frivolous house-wife. I am now totally the frivolous house-wife. I am trying to embrace it, to relish this time because it is a gift, and who knows how long it will last, but I am a little sad to loose a part of my identity. When people ask me what I do, I won't be able to say "I'm a scientist." Even this weekend when asked that very question I explained about just finishing up working on a paper in an attempt to pump up my importance or something. It's going to be hard to break that habit of letting people know that I'm at home now, but I used to do something that made me unique and special, and in a way that was easily conveyed by my job description.

It's important to break that habit, of referring to my scientist-self. My identity is not just about what I did, even when I was actively doing it. It was a part. In reality a small part of my interests and experiences. Now I have been given the opportunity to explore interests I didn't have time for, and even more important the time to experience fully being mom. Not everybody gets this chance these days, and I should consider myself very, very fortunate to get to spend so much time with my boy, playing and getting to now him, and in a way in which I can be absorbed by him in those moments.

Nursery school time, will be time to put the house in order, and time to think and be creative. It has been put forth that in order to be creative, one need exactly this, time alone, time with one-self and one's thoughts. Time to digest what we experience and put it into some form of expression (or not). And whether that expression in making bread or sewing or even writing this silly blog doesn't so much matter. It is time that I haven't had, time I have been craving, and time I probably won't have in the not so far off future, so I'd better take good advantage.

2010-08-16T08:38:00.009-04:00

Summer, so far...

Sewing

"We the Guys"

Slide

Lush

"Crunch Buckets!"

Storms

*Crawldaddies Rock!

Wheaton Park

His favorite Zoo attraction

Lion

Farm

* note to myself because I want to remember this story 20 years from now: We went to see the "Crawldaddies" give a cajun inspired free concert at Strathmore. They gave out beads to the little dancing kids. The boy got his hands on some, and at the end of the evening when we left to go, he was absolutely adamant that he return them to the guys. So he walked up the the stage and placed them at the feet of the lead singer while they are still performing. They train them too well at the Montessori school!

2010-08-02T14:17:00.002-04:00

The arrival of the iPad has created a backlog in the blog. Three days without power and a second minor outage last week can also be blamed. Summer isn't helping either, because most days we are busy being out and about, taking some pictures, but not taking the time for the actual computer where I still do my picture downloading and processing.

For the record, we have been to the pool, and an outdoor concert, and to the Farm (supposedly to "pick" peaches, but really we just rode the green tractor, and bought already picked peaches at the store). We've gone to the parks and rode the train, and bought ice cream from the ice cream truck. The boy got his first haircut, and man did he do a good job. He was actually excited about going (thanks creators of "Oswald"). We've rode the metro to visit D.C., and rode the metro for no other reason than to ride the train. I've finished two knitting projects and started two new ones. I sewed a bag and a mini bag, and am trying to find more time for more sewing. I've decided I need a crafty budget, so that my obsessions with making things don't completely bankrupt us. We got an iPad and I think it's quickly becoming mine, and I like it.

Lots of bloggable moments, but I'm to busy living them, so the pictures and elaboration will have to wait.

2010-07-28T09:22:00.002-04:00

Dudes are here cutting down our neighbors trees that got damaged in The Storm. We are losing three trees total, possible a fourth when all is said and done, and I'm kind of bummed. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad nobody's house was damaged when a 50 ft. oak got tangled up in the wind and came crashing done right between three houses, taking large parts of two other trees with it, but I'm very sad to lose the trees. They provided our house with shade keeping our backyard bearable on the hottest summer day, and also helped stabilize the hill between our yard and our neighbors. I will miss you trees.

72 hrs.after the storm we got our power back at 1:30 in the morning, proving that PEPCO dudes don't sleep when there's power out. Thanks dudes whoever you are. I was just about to get really frustrated.

I guess things are almost back to normal. Now I have to go clean out our fridge.

2010-07-18T21:54:00.004-04:00

Pictures of Feet

I've noticed that my 2 year old son has a strange fascination with taking pictures of his feet. Every time I go to download pictures off the camera I find some pics of little precocious feet.

I wonder where he picked this up from?

FO: On-Hold socks Ravelry Page It took me several months, but these socks are how I like them, nice and tight, and long.

2010-07-07T10:00:00.002-04:00

Since quitting my job (well, more accurately letting my career wind down and not taking steps to feed it, so to speak) I'm finding that I'm perfectly content spending my mornings puttering in the kitchen and slowly taking back the house. In other words, I spend my mornings cooking and cleaning and I am perfectly happy with that. In fact, I'm really enjoying it. So much so that the paper in languishing a bit, because I keep thinking of things a want to cook (and eat). I feel a little guilty about this. Am I not suppose to want more, and be more? But the more I am away, the more I think that maybe I don't. At least not now. I want a manageable lifestyle. One where we have time to enjoy things a little bit more. It makes me a little bit sad in away, but I really want to enjoy this phase of my life, (the phase with the kid(s)), instead of fumbling through it in utter exhaustion, because I'm not going to get a second chance at it. I just hope that me not working takes a little stress off my husband and lets him enjoy it a little too.

2010-06-30T08:46:00.002-04:00

Everytime I do Front Post or Back Post stitch in the Short N' Sweet sweater thing (which there are a lot of), I am reminded of the "swing the Picket Fence" scene in Hoosiers. Strange, but it makes me smile. I like Hoosiers.

2010-06-28T09:13:00.006-04:00

Summer of Hooks 2010

I haven't written here for two weeks, and I have a whole lotta stuff with which to feed the blog.

The funny thing about not working, is that I'm as busy as ever. I honestly don't know how we keep things going when I was working. I just find things to do, and I think I will for perpetuity.

Things are growing in the garden, the pool has reopened for the summer, and I've been crocheting. The house, by the way, is still a mess. Although I did clean out my closet and reorganize my stash. I have a lot of craft store yarns....

I've decided this post will mostly be about the crocheting/knitting side of my life. I've taken to the crocheting thing, because its hot and for the most part I am not feeling the wool, and I feel learning something.

As you will recall this all started with some dishrags I made on our trip to Hilton Head. When I got home I restarted my DC blanket. The original one was way to large at 250 stitches (it was about king sized), and I started it when I was pregnant and the man was on a business trip to London. This one has a more manageable 150. And I like the way the stripes grow randomly. It is made with Red Heart Super Saver in various colors I had in my stash (see cheap craft store yarn and stash above). It is goinging, but all DC all the time gets boring.

First I want a definitive volume on crochet technique, so of course, I went to Debbie Strollers "the Happy Hooker." And in I quite friendly way it introduce me to basic techniques.

Then I picked up Eddie Eckman's "Crochet Motif" book , which is absolutely addictive, and great for scraps of yarn. I've basically made myself I bunch of Christmas tree ornaments! So my tree which has been bare ( I believe in slowly collecting ornaments, and making them), will look fuller next season, so that nobody can come over to see it.

Then one the way home form the pool one afternoon. I spied this shop (The Yarn Spot). Which I went to this weekend and bought some three irish girls yarn (Georgia Peach) and some denim yarn to make "short n' sweet" from aforementioned Debbie Stroller book.

I'm also still working on the "On Hold" socks, but I want to finish them so I can start socks with the Ga Peach....

So basically, I'm having a wonderful creative time, and it sure is nice to have very nice yarn shop 5 minutes from my house. Maybe I will make it over for needlework time one day.... (a mom can dream can't she?).

2010-06-14T09:05:00.003-04:00

Vacation

I brought three projects with me to the beach: the 2nd green sweater, a blue sock, and a bunch of sugar n' cream cotton and a crochet hook. Who knew crocheting dishcloths is such a great car trip project?

Didn't touch the sweater (too hot to knit alpaca), and I worked on the sock on the trip home.

However, it might be a crochet kind of summer mostly. I crochet to big dish towel, and started the little striped one, as well as completing a 2nd dishrag that was in use. I found it strangely relaxing.

2010-06-09T08:28:00.003-04:00

Hilton Head, SC or Beach 2010 pt 1

What a difference a year makes! Last year the boy was terrified of the ocean. This year, he actually asked to go out there. (However, he still admitted to being a little scared sometimes).

Hilton Head is a really nice beach. We had great weather. We played in the sand. We played in the surf. We played in our pool. Nobody got sunburnt. All in all a great vacation.

2010-05-25T14:03:00.003-04:00

Back to the Garden

Things are still looking hopeful in our lovely little patio container garden. We've gotten to eat some strawberries, just a couple at a time, as they ripen.We augmented this with a trip to Butler's Orchard for pick your own last weekend. They were good.

The Arugula is growing and I should be able to start harvesting some leaves for salad soon. It's very peppery. I have some basil coming along, and I planted some mint, cilantro and flat leaf parsley in the actual flowerbed, and they haven't died or been eaten ....yet. I also got brave a put the bean plant, two peas, and two squash plants in the actual flower bed, and so far they are okay, although some insects have been nibbling at the peas.

And the tomatoes are great. They are starting to develop fruit. I'm so excited!!! Fresh tomatoes.

I also have three container squash. I replanted one today, and might have killed it. The stem is split. I probably should have replanted it earlier, but the squash in my big grey, ant infested pot looks great. We shall see.....

Sean's mother day project got replanted, and they are still growing. I hope they will flower again. I think they are petunias. Do petunias re-flower?

Overall we are looking nice and green and hopeful as we begin the challenge of summer.

2010-05-16T14:16:00.004-04:00

The Sweater

I'd been wanting to make a cardigan, so in January after a lot of thinking and looking for the right pattern, I settled on Calluna . It had cables and interesting texture, things I was looking for, but I have to say it wasn't my dream caridigan. I didn't like the 3/4 sleeves, but that is easy to fix. I liked the half button, lower half skirt thing.

As I knit a began to wonder if this sweater was too mommyish and frumpy, but having seen no other options, I continued on.

I persisted, and now I have a completed sweater. The sweater I knit during blizzard part II, the sweater knit right after being radioactive, the sweater I knit when I left my job. All important memories to associate with a article of clothing I will probably be wearing for years to come.

A couple of things about it: It grew tremendously when I blocked it, particulary in length, and this is a pleasant thing. I kind of anticipated it from others comments on ravelry. I ended up knitting the sleeves at 3/4 like written (because who really wants to knit full lenght seed stitch sleeves when you could be done faster), and they ended up just a bit longer. They sit just above my wrists, and it works.

I don't like how the skirt and opening curl. They need a more substantial edge to hold the shaping and cables. I was warned about this on ravelry as well, but too late to anything about it. It is better know that it is longer and blocked, but still not perfect.

It's tricky to sew round seed stitch sleeves into a non-seed stitch ribbing armhole. They weren't perfectly fit to each other either, but I managed. Two things a found helpful: basting together first, and sewing from the top of the shoulder down, that way if there's any weirdness at least it's not at the top of the shoulder where it would be extremely obvious. I had to sew them on a couple of times, but I think I got them on pretty good. No puffy sleeves!

Anyway it is done and I'm pretty satistfied. On to green sweater # 2!

2010-05-16T14:13:00.001-04:00

Post 101!

We had a wedding this weekend, and the boy wore his tie!

2010-05-11T14:35:00.005-04:00

Confessions of a Mommy Scientist

Ms. Glampyre's recent posts, and my own situation of being almost, but not quite out the door have got me thinking a little about why its so damn hard for women with children in science.

A while back I read a blurb (I think at Salon, but maybe at Wash. Post, I don't remember) about how the statistics don't reveal any trend in women with higher degrees dropping out of the work force to raise their children. The piece was horribly written, and the analysis of the statistics was flat out wrong and ill thought out. The authors thesis was that if you look at the population of stay-at home mom's most have a high school education at most, and it is their lack of good choices and opportunity that leads to women becoming stay-at home mom's. The author might want to have considered that it is only a smallish subset of women in the general public who hold advanced degree, thus you wouldn't expect them to make up a big part of the stay-at home population, but this is neither here nor there. Anyway it was that thing about choices that got me thinking.

Simply put, I think that one of the reason's women with children have such a hard time making their scientific career's go beyond motherhood, is a lack of good choices. There aren't part-time scientist jobs. There isn't even an 80% option. Mid level, non PI, non grant writing, researcher positions are hard to come by, and from the talk I here at my former work, getting scarcer. It's all or none. And to do the all part and sustain it over a long career, even if you don't have children means you have to be very passionate about it. And if you do have children and are the primary caregiver........

The reason women with children lack good options, is that they are really starting their career in earnest right around the time they have children. In most other career paths by your early thirties you have a job and have established yourself somewhat. Not being established means they have little good negotiating power. It's hard to get someone to hire you in your first real position if you want to work 80%, especially when there are at least ten other good candidates who don't.

That brings me to the cold hard truth. We train way too many scientists for them all to have viable careers (especially in academic circles). Yes, we let them put their ten years in as graduate student and post-doc, paying them little, and taking advantage of their brain power (graduate students and post-docs are the engines that make science roll forward), and then we expect a lot of them to not make it as scientists. And this selection process hits women with children especially hard. Afterall we aren't stupid. Who would want that kind of crazy? Only people who are incredibly passionate about what they do.

Don't get me wrong there are women who make it work, and have done a great job with both motherhood and science. Then there are the horror stories, couple living apart, children raised by nannies (a notion most American women dislike), divorces, mental breakdowns. So knowing when to quit and what your priorities are is important.

Do I have answers? Mid level positions can help women. Real jobs sooner would help women. More flexible career trajectory would help women. More understanding about flexible career trajectory would help women.

Advice? Plan babies for natural breaks (end of grad school, end of post-doc), and take a year off. My first year back was hell and I had an extremely understanding boss. Marry a non-scientist, with non-scientist income. Don't be afraid to hire a nanny if you can afford it. I did traditional centered based daycare and the drop up and pick off added a lot of stress to my routine. In hind site a nanny would have better if a could get over that darn problem I have with hiring someone to work for me at home full time and paying them so little to do it. Study something where there isn't as much competition, but is still interesting (I stole this from a elder successful mommy scientist, could be rephrased choose your project and mentor wisely). Don't be afraid of the notion that you can't come back. I think this may be more perception than reality. Not many women attempt, so people aren't used to the idea. I think (at least in Biological fields) it's possible. I'm not saying it wouldn't be damn hard, but so is having a career in the first place. And I think the more women try to do this, the more likely it will be an acceptable practice. Think outside the box in terms of career; volunteering might be a good way to keep in practice or come back if you can afford it. And keep in mind you scientific training can apparently translate into all sorts of careers (at least that's what "they" say....)

Most importantly however, if you want to have a baby do it and figure out the rest. It will fall in line somehow. We don't have forever to have babies. It is just a chapter in our lives. It passes, and you won't get a second chance to write it. If you want a baby go for it. I also say this, because as you get into your mid-thirties you'll find things can start happening. Your parents start having medical problems, and mid thirties is prime time for center types of cancer to start showing up in women, and also the start of when autoimmune issues start cropping up. In other words don't wait until the last minute to have the baby you always wanted. You never know what might happen to interfere with you plans.

Having children is very challenging with two working parents no matter what their careers. Science might be particularly challenging because we build it up to be so much more than a career, but it's not. (well I guess for some it is more, but well nevermind)

Maybe women drop out of science permenantly because once you really leave that envirnoment, it's like clouds part and you suddenly can see the sun peeking through. I've been having a great time with my son, and I'm more busy than you could ever imagine. Maybe women don't come back to the bench because once they leave they realize there is a whole world out there they've been missing, that they can contribute to in a meaningful way, and suddenly they don't want to go back !

2010-05-07T13:46:00.003-04:00

Truck Touch 2010!

...or The kid drives a BUS!!!!, (and a digger, and several trucks)!

Whoever thought of this as a fundraiser is a genius, or at least probably has lots of toddler boy experience. For the uninitiated, this is where a bunch of people or businesses volunteer their vehicles and let little children crawl around them, sit in the drivers seat, and blow their horns. Basically, every three year old boy's dream come true. We survived truck touch, and I've never seen the kid happier or more overstimulated.

Same weekend end, we managed Md Sheep and Wool 2010. This might be mommy's dream come true, but I'm not really doing it up right these days. I think I'd have to go sans kid and husband to do that. We did see sheep, and alpacas, and musicians, and even had sheep almost run us over. The kid especially liked the tractor ride in from the parking lot, and he liked the sheep too.

I did not buy anything, I have too many projects going or planned, and I don't want to add another, besides I didn't have much time to look for yarn.

In other news, this is our first week where Sean comes home at noon. I was a little worried about whether its the right thing for him/us, but we are starting to get into our groove, and a think it could be lots of fun. The weather has been gorgous to boot, so we've got to go out to parks, and play outside alot in the afternoon which I really like.

I'm still working on the paper. I've been going into old work most mornings, so not alot it getting done at home, but its kind of a pleasant rythmn. Morning at the lab, nap (which bytheway was a lot of work at first as the kid decided me picking him up at noon might= no nap), and then playtime. Good stuff. However, it's going to take at least another month the finish writing the thing. My boss is a bundle of nerves because of her upcoming review, and hasn't exactly been able to do very much, and we keep rearranging the figures. It is going to take forever. I just wonder when I get my red stapler!

2010-04-22T08:07:00.004-04:00

Cookbooks

One of the great things about not working is having the time to cook real meals. Meaning something more complicated then spaghetti and Prego (although I have to admit, the boy really likes his spaghetti and Prego). Also meaning that I don't have to cook Tuesday and Wednesday's meal on Monday night after the kid is in bed.

I'm rediscovering my love of cooking, and love of eating well, which really we haven't been doing that much of lately.

About I month before leaving official work, I convinced my husband to let me try cooking mostly vegetarian meals during the week. Let's get this straight, We are not vegetarians. I like a good medium rare steak as much as the next gal, and a good hamburger too. My reasons for the switch is that it forces us to eat more vegetables. The challenge is in trying to come up with good combinations and different ones.

I will also mention that having a nice repertoire of vegetarian soups or other one pot meals in your cooking regime is nice, because often you have your basic ingredients just lying around. Dry lentils have a nice long shelf life, chicken on the other hand does not. I can cobble together a good red lentil soup any day from things I have lying around my pantry and your basic carrot and onion which I always have anyway. Some vegetarian cooking is very pantry friendly, whereas meat based meal always require shopping and forethought. Also the kid, loves lentil soup with rice!!!!!

Back to the point of this post: I love me a nice hardcover cookbook. (Hint: if ever need a gift for me and can't figure out what to get me consider that last sentence) I bought two new ones yesterday, and I am positively excited about cooking from them. I'm a little bummed that I've already done my cooking for the week!

The new cookbooks made me think of my collection, and sharing with you, my one reader, my favorites. My shelf contains both some great conventional cookbooks and some vegetarian ones, but here goes:

Betty Crocker Cookbook This is just hands down the most friendly, easy to use classic cookbook, with all the roasting tables and stuff you need. My favorite recipe is the White Chili (which is a chicken chili/ soup with white beans and corn. Also very useful baking section

The Gourmet Cookbook My sister gave this to me one year, and it is a great cookbook, not at all intimidating as the name would imply, most of the recipes are pretty straightforward. Favorites include Goulash, Oatmeal cookies, Glazed carrots, Spanish style Fritatta. I often use this one to get ideas, or figure out how to do something if I'm not exactly following their recipes

The New Moosewood Cookbook This one ain't so new anymore, but it's the classic vegetarian cookbook, many great recipes. The soups are some of my favorites. Brazilian Black Bean Soup, Cold Cucumber Yogurt Soup, Gazpacho, and the recipe for Falfel (although not traditional and puffy) and Tahini-Lemon Sauce

125 best Vegetarian Slow Cooker recipes Everybody should own this book! It is excellent. And the marvel of being able to prep everything the night before, put it in the fridge, and plug in in the morning. You couldn't do that with meat, because of the food safety issues, but with vegetables it works. Fav recipes: Red lentil and Carrot Soup w Coconut, Tortilla Soup with Corn and Chilies, Smoky White Chili with Potatoes,any number of the other Chilis, and what I cooked this week, Tamale Pie with Chili Cornmeal Crust . An excellent, excellent cookbook, and many of the dishes are surprisingly hearty for being vegetarian.

So there you have it, my favorite go-to cookbooks. The ones I just bought are Jamie's Food Revolution (the photography is absolutely stunning, and he had a whole chapter on curries, which sold the book for me), and How to cook everything Vegetarian which I wanted after ready an article about Mr. Bittman's food philosophy, which I find very akin to my own. Both books have a philosophical slant, and as I haven't cooked from either I can't really say whether I would recommend them. Perhaps more on this later. In the meantime Bon Apetite!

2010-04-19T08:54:00.004-04:00

Containers

Well, as mentioned in the last post, it appears to finely, and safely be spring!! That means it is time for me be compelled to plant some stuff. (Last year I did not feel so compelled, I was too stressed and tired and had my hands full with a 1.5 year old.) This year I have time on my hands, so why not be a little bit more ambitious than usual.

In all the talk about how people should try to grow their own food and all, I've decided to container grow some vegetables. Why container grow? A. The soil in our yard has very little topsoil, with clay underneath, so would need a lot of conditioning to get stuff out of it. B. Deer and Rabbits like our yard, but will mostly stay off our deck (I think). C. Our deck gets excellent sun exposure, far better than the rest of the yard (although this means it is very hot there in the summer and this may be a problem).

So what are we trying???? I bought some everbearing strawberries, three different types of small tomatoes (one called patio which seems to be breed for containers), a peppermint plant, marigolds (okay they not edible, but pretty and will go in the actually garden) and a pepper plant which I might have alreadly killed.

In addition I'm seeding argula, basil, green beans (the big tall thing in the picture), non support needing peas, yellow squash, and zuccinni. I hear zuccinni is fairly easy to grow and very prolific. I might purchase some more herbs and maybe spinach seeds, as it seems the greens might be pretty easy to grow. I also want to try making sprouts with the kiddo.

I've had a good start, but I need to get some big containers and a lot of potting soil. This operation is neither eco-friendly or economical, I fear, but maybe next year or in future years, if I can continue to do it. Maybe one year I will actually conquer composting, but it seems you need some kind of advanced degree to safely do that (oh wait a second, don't I have some kind of advanced degree in something bio related. Oh yeah, its in something entirely useless to the real world, mammalian cell biology and biochemistry!!!!!!!! Good thing I didn't have to pay money for that education! just time :)

Anyway It's kind of nice having the new green babies around, kind of hopeful again. That reminds me, I need to water everybody outside. We where away this weekend, and the tomatoes look thirsty.

2010-04-09T09:30:00.003-04:00

Spring!!!

As any D.C. native will tell you, Spring arrives when the Cherry blossoms bloom. In celebration the boy and I went downtown to see the pretty flowers on his day off from nursery school (Good friday). We got to ride the train and visit mommy's work. I managed pretty well with a toddler and a stroller, but we did lose a hat when boarding our last train, as I frantically was doing something with the stroller when the train pulled up. It was crowded, but pretty and worth the trip, although we didn't make it very far along the tidal basin. We also saw three fire trucks with their sirens blaring on the walk back to Farrugut North! Sean was plumb tuckered out from the trip and took a three hour nap when we got home. I really like having easy access to a city, and will miss it if we ever move.

2010-03-26T22:16:00.005-04:00

Stuff....

Spring is here. I drafted my fantasy league on the same day I went to my little cousin's bridal shower. Funny she isn't little anymore (well maybe there's alittle bit of the little cousin left if you look really hard). When did that happen?

Sean wore green on March 17 to celbrate his most likely Irish roots on my side of the family.

In the beginning of March I missed three consecutive Mondays from work, do to Sean sick with fever (1), Sean sick with overeating/throwing up in the middle of the night (2), mommy food poisoning throwing up all night (3). I knit these stars on the days Sean was sick. They are a good quick project. First finished objects 2010! Details on my ravelry page when I get a chance.

Offically down to my last week in the lab, to be followed by writing, some from home, and some from the lab, no pay. I think I've turned the corner and am okay with this, though I am still madly scrambling to do experiments (during normal working hours).

I've been listening to a lot of concerts on npr. This is getting me into trouble. I hear stuff I like, and I download an album. Very good marketing policy. Tonight I'm downloading Joanna Newsom, after listening to a very nice concert that was here in D.C. Mostily I'm listening to women, which is odd.

2010-03-10T21:43:00.004-05:00

Endings and Beginnings

I've entered what is probably my last month doing bench science.

I have mixed feelings about this. It's kind of like a really bad and slow break-up. Science, we've had some great times, but this really isn't working anymore....

It's hard not to feel like a failure. But this is how it goes for most people.

Part of the failure thing is probably because my beginning is very open ended. Slow down... Spend more time with the kid. Get life back to calm. Then figure out what it is I would like to do, and how best to go about doing it.

I'm luck I can take this break, but it's a mixed blessing not to have a finicial goad pushing you forward.

The kid has changed daycares. So it is both an end and beginning for him too. I miss the old place, but I don't miss the driving into Bethesda during rush hour to drop him off or pick him up. My husband is doing the dropping and picking now. I have an extra hour of work, and I'm suprised to feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

2010-02-12T21:35:00.005-05:00

I (I mean WE) survived Blizzard week 2010!!!!!

"Sauraman is this the worst you have??????"

mmm okay???? 30 hrs without power......Boy, heat is nice. So is hot water, and lights, and T.V. Thank goodness we have a gas stove and we charged the protable DVD player just in case. Oh French Press, how I love you so.......

But the power dudes got the lights back on and the house returned to cozy, and we spent a week mostily cozy at home.

Out our back window (which now has a curtain). That's alot of snow.

2010-02-08T08:46:00.002-05:00

I am thankful for our charged portable DVD player, plentiful food in the house, extra warm ikea blanket, and that our stove top is natural gas which can be lit without electricity (and doesn't have some stupid safety mechanism like our oven). We survived the storm, but started to worry that we might be days trapped and without power and heat (30 hrs) as the temperature in the house started to fall. Now the question is, we'll we ever get out of here???

2010-01-31T09:57:00.002-05:00

note: it's been a little hectic around here abouts as our life returns to normal. These are my thoughts while I was away. I couldn't post because I don't post from work computers as they leave record of work's prescence in your code and this is not a good thing. I might eventually post the survey meter movie, if I can edit it down a little.

Isolation (written on 011810

50uM/L =50nmol/ml=50pmol/ul, if I want 600pmol from a solution that is 50uM, then I need 12 ul!!!

Gosh darn it, I knew a gained something in all that science training. I can calculate stuff...

I'm back at work, doing science stuff. It's starting pretty slowly. I'm taking my time. I fear my heart just isn't in it anymore, but I'm trying.

I'm not back home yet. I'm staying in a nice hotel, sleeping-in in a way too cushy bed. I miss my guys something awful.

I sort of feel like someone, a very large someone, has taken me by my ankles and given me a good long, hard shaking. I can't say I'm really hurt by the experience, maybe a little sore, but mostly I'm just jarred.

The whole last 9 months since all this medical crazy began has been really hard on me emotionally. That coupled to the winding down of my scientific career, has my self-esteem (which has always been an ephemeral thing) just crumpling. I have to rebuild. I know that, but I'm scared I can't, and I don't know where to begin.

I shouldn't be putting this out there, so openly for all to see, but I am. It's part of the story, an important part of how this has affected me, and if someone stumbles into this and it helps them know they aren't alone, well than I guess that's a good thing. And if a potentially employer one day stumbles into it, Is it really that damning, you know that I'm a normal person?????

Maybe I will get to the whole life-affirming part of the experience. You know the part where you feel lucky you have defeated death type thing, but somehow I don't think that's how my brain works.

2010-01-09T21:33:00.003-05:00

Change of Plans

(sometimes I wish I could hide in a closet)

I just came back from my pre-scan, and found out they need to split up my dose over 8 months, because there is just too much tissue left from the surgery. It wouldn't be safe to do it in one shot.

This means the first dose is less radiation and is done outpatient, next week. Meaning I'm staying in a hotel for two extra days. I won't be in isolation, but I am supposed to keep a low profile next week. I haven't decided whether I'm coming in to work or what I'm going to do.

The upside is that I can keep my knitting. Although I might keep it in a box in my basement for 6 months to cool off. I will probably be more comfortable in a hotel than the hospital, but I will be on my own.

The bad news is in 8 months I get to repeat this whole damn process. I think with a little more radioactivity and a hospital stay this time. 8 extra months to pine for another child, and wonder what ‘s it going to be next time to put off my plans for another year or more. (Can we say still too much remnant left?)

I don't mean to be so flippant about all this. I know this is cancer. I know for safety reasons, they don't have a choice about this. They can't risk frying my bone marrow. I know from reading other peoples blogs, there are people out there, some of whom are younger than me, who are facing a much tougher fight from a similar type of cancer. But I just wanted to be done so I could move on.

My radioactive knitting challenge is "Swallowtail shawl", knit is some yarn that I got from Elann for an entirely different project. I figure being away from my 2 year-old for a week is a good time to knit me some lace, which requires more concentration, and is more fragile than most of what I do. It's a small shawl so I might be able to finish it in a week too. Or I may be simply underestimating it.

Uh…hmmm..So can we start the new year in September 2010?

2010-01-09T21:27:00.001-05:00

Unfinished business of 2009

We, here at "The Hippo and Snuffles Show" regret to inform you that the new year will be postponed until February 1, 2010. This is because we first must finish the 2009 cancer business before declaring shenanigans and starting anew. And we would like desperately to declare out with the old, but there's just this last little thing a need to do before I can say that: take around 125mCurie of I-131 , you know just to make sure we've gotten all the cancer cells or potential cancer cells that the surgeon may have left behind. The goal is to have no thyroid cells (cancerous or not) left.

This all goes down next week. I've been prepared, withdrawn from thyroid hormone, eating a low iodine diet, which basically means ones prepared entirely by me so to be sure nobody sneaks some iodized salt in there somewhere. This has meant a lot of salads and a lot of cooking. I even tried to make fresh bread with yeast, but it was too cold in our kitchen to get a good rise out of the yeast so the bread was a little dense. So far I'm tolerating the hormone withdrawal pretty well, a little tired, but not so tired I can't cook or function. I'm a little distracted, but I suspect this has more to do with anxiety than anything else.

So next week I go to the hospital to take the therapeutic dose, and get isolated for two days, then spend the rest of the week at a hotel, so as not to expose our 2-year old to the radioactivity, so he won't get thyroid cancer (ironic, huh?). It will be hard being away from my boys at a time when I am so emotionally vulnerable, but I don't see any other way to handle it. I can't just simple stay three feet away from a toddler for a week. Like all this crap, it is just something to be endured and lived through. And soon I will be back.

The stupid thing that makes me a little sad, is that I really wanted to be pregnant right now. I wanted to be finishing my post-doc with the next baby started. I'm a little sad and bitter about the baby I won't be having right now. It's been hard facing the mom's at daycare who are now expecting their second child (6 of the boy's classmates, out of a group around 15). It's been hard to smile and not tear up. In fact I have teared up a couple of times. I keep trying to remind myself, that I still have plenty of biological time, and that sometimes these things that seem like a bad thing on the surface, sometimes they turn out for the best in the grand scheme of things. But it's kind of hard to see that this is only a little set back. 6 months to 1 year after this procedure I can start trying and maybe the timing will be more fortuitous than I can know now. But this is the thing that thyroid cancer and its treatment have taken from me, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who has faced this kind of thing, being that this disease is commonly diagnosed in women my age.

To sum-up, 2009 was a tough year. A lot of great moments, but a lot of difficult ones to. Looking forward to 2010 !which by special decree starts in February this year!

2009-12-25T22:16:00.003-05:00

Merry Christmas

2009-12-22T12:15:00.004-05:00

Snowed In!

We just got plowed! Four days after the storm! Two feet of snow in one day! The county forgot we existed (i.e. we are on the east side of the county and don't have enough money to be bothered with, also why our schools aren't so great).

Three days in a house with a 2-year-old. I think we fared pretty well. I can't say he loved the snow. It was too much. He couldn't walk anywhere. And it was cold, and he didn't want to wear mittens. He did help shovel, and mowed the snow. We need a sled, and a second shovel, and better mittens. My husband wants a snow blower, but I think that is being a little reactionary. The house is a disaster, but that's normal.

The CRV got out this morning. Mr. Jetta is staying home one more day and hoping for some melting. The real question is whether the CRV will make it back up the hill. People have been abandoning their cars at the bottom of the hill all weekend. Our neighbor is parked in our driveway because they couldn't make it up the rest of the hill.

Husband took child to daycare and I stayed I have a bad cold.I needed rest. I never stay home from work, so you know I must be feeling pretty rundown. I'm not feeling guilty about it. Life happens I can't to anything about it. I get snowed in for three days. I get sick. Work will wait, even if there is a clock ticking on my fellowship (and career). Perhaps all the more reason not to care.

Stay tuned for the holiday post. We will survive even if my brother -in- law gets a late gift because we can't get to the store....

2009-12-16T22:01:00.002-05:00

Holiday Madness

(picture of boy "fixing" his new Hanukkah gift. Please not he is not mad, although he is quite often "Mad, Mad, Mad" in the toddler who wants dangerous things his parents won't let him have like scissors or stoves, sense of the word)

My family has quiet literally gone mad this season. Mom has been in a hospital since Thanksgiving. She has early onset dementia complicated by chronic alcohol abuse. It's probably the most complicated relationship I will ever have. It's still changing and I'm still trying to figure it out. She is a difficult and tragic character. The conversations I've had with my mom in the hospital are more normal than any I've had with her for ten years. I guess I am grateful for the opportunity to talk to her again. She should be home soon, and hopefully we can handle the new medicated mom.

My sister already commented on her loss and how it has been felt for years by our family, particularly around the holiday time. I'm cautiously optimistic we can now reach a better equilibrium, and maybe sort of have her back for awhile. We shall see...

In the midst of all these goings on the boy turned 2. He is a remarkable little guy. I feel like we maybe shortchanged him a little bit on the birthday, but he did get a party with all the Jersey relatives. This is probably the last year I can get away with planning nothing for him. But he was happy, and got to open lots of presents and eat carvel cake, and see his cousins, and Nana and Pop-pop (who he adores). Than last weekend Nana and Pop-pop visited us for early Hanukkah, and he got more presents and had a blast.

In our mixed holiday traditions, the tree will go up this weekend and I will make potato and sweet potato latkes. Hopefully we can finish our Christmas shopping. Maybe I will make toffee....

And I'm almost done my official Christmas knitting. I've knit two presents to be given alongside other "real" gifts. Neither item is worn. One is missing two legs and two ears. The other is a set missing buttons. Intriguing?

I have two things on needles right now. The aforementioned present missing parts, and a pair of "on-hold" socks, from Wendy Johnson's book. I'm itching to cast-on. I saw a cute hat pattern, and I'm thinking about Calluna. Also we need ornaments for the tree.....

I finished the diagonal lace socks, and have worn then several times. The fit very nicely. And the other set of presents.

Don't know if I'll get much time to post, so have a happy sane holiday for me.

2009-10-28T20:51:00.003-04:00

Ahhhhhh...... (note sigh of relief, not aggrevation

Things got quickly resolved, thanks to new doc. Thank you new doc, you really seem to know what your doing, even if you look a little bit overworked.

Here is a picture of Miss Anna in her finally complete handknit. See how much she seems to love it!

Will I ever learn?

2009-10-26T22:01:00.002-04:00

Healthcare

Warning: this is a rant in which I use fake profanity, and the occasional "damn" and "pissed off" and "hell". Sorry for my lack of usual discretion. I will return to the normal nonsensical dribble about knitting and 2-year-olds shortly.

After the last three weeks or so trying to get I-131 "therapy" scheduled, and dealing an unrelated urgent medical need, I think I've decided I'm all for a single payer healthcare system or something. It sure as heck has to beat what we've got.

No, it's not that an in imminent danger of being kicked out of my insurance coverage or something like that. It's just the inability to get information out of people or get things done, or receive a phone call back. I know doctor's offices are busy places, but I'm trying to get treated for cancer (albeit a not terribly serious kind) so I can have my life back, and get off the medical crazy train I'm on. Yes, I will leave you the xxxx alone, if you do your xxxxing job, and coordinate my damn medical care. And if someone could have just come out and said it might take 3 weeks to get a date (yes, to schedule the procedure, which has to be scheduled at least 4-6 weeks in advance anyway, not actually have the procedure) it would have made me feel a whole hellofalot better. Just knowing a reasonable time frame to expect that you might be able to work out whatever it is you need to work out. And then I probably would have left you alone as well.

Instead nobody bothers to tell me what is going on. All I get is the impression that my file is literally sitting on some physician's desk waiting for her to get around to it. All you needed to do was tell me that you were waiting for a response from my doctor, and I could have gotten on the phone to my doctor and annoyed the hell out of their office until they answered the physician's question. Or you could have asked me and I would have clued you in the fact that I was pretty much decided on going withdrawl over Thyrogen stimulated therapy 'cause I feel based on my own research that although an annoyance, the withdrawl is probably a little better than Thyrogen and a don't want to go through this more than once (thank you very much!!!!!). And yes I do understand that it makes said physician's life slightly more difficult b/c the scheduling is harder. Sorry.

The end result is that I ended up going to a 2nd doctor, who the surgeon recommended, who deals with this hospital all the time, and I think they are going to set this up, and then I will follow up with my old doctor, because a generally like him, even if his office is incompetent and slow as molasses. I hope I haven't pissed anyone off too much by doing this.

I feel like I'm cheating on my endocrinologist. Yes, somewhere amoungst the feelings of indignation and frustration I also feel guilty.

And I don't even have a date yet.

2009-10-03T08:30:00.003-04:00

Scars

aka "Mommy. Boo-boo."

I'm trying my best to own my fresh scars with pride. It's a pity I had to go through this again so soon. The old one had healed so nicely, but I new there was a better than average chance that at some point the otherside might need to be removed for one reason or another.

I keep it out of the sun mostly, but I don't hide it. If people ask I explain matter of factly. I have thyroid cancer. It's very common, especially in women my age. It's a curable kind of cancer (especially in women my age).

It's a distraction.

It's an annoyance.

It's a little scary.

It makes you think, about you know.......life.

And with any luck, in a couple of months I should have my life back.

2009-09-26T08:23:00.003-04:00

Beach 2009

It's been a little while, and we've been all kinds of busy.

One thing that happened in the time between posts was our annual trip to Duck, N.C. It was very different from last year. For instance last year we were all about walking places in the stroller with a non-mobile kid. This year? We might as well have left the stroller at home for the amount of time he would agree to sit in it without demanding "Bup!"

That being said it was a good time. Nanna came with us for the week, and Pop-pop joined us for a couple of days. Sean really got to know Nanna. And his face would light up when he saw her.

He was a little unsure of the beach thing at first, but as you can see he got into it eventually. We did have a lot of rain (what do you do with a toddler on a rainy day at the beach?), but we also had several really nice days so it worked out.

2009-08-30T21:15:00.003-04:00

Perfect Day

Today was the perfect summer Sunday. The weather was beautiful, and everybody in our house was in a great mood. We just seemed to feed off of each other, especially the little guy. He just seemed to bubble from moment to moment in the way that only a toddler can. Each moment being exciting and fun. And it didn't hurt that we slept in til 7:00!

First the zoo where the little guy found the misters, ran for them and got soaked every time (hey a I let him, how could I not,he found it so interesting and funny that he was getting wet). Then home for a nice long nap. Lunch at subway, which he ate for once! And then off for our last afternoon at the pool. The little guy is just starting to figure out how to kick in the water. Next year he'll swimming for sure (well maybe). And he and mommy split a Klondike bar! He really liked it. Then home for a quick bath and we dared go to the local pub for pizza at 6:00. And get this: He sat through the entire meal. We had a little help from the TVs (it is a sports bar), Especially the Nascar station. Anytime he got antsy, we would just point to the TV and say "Look at the cars" And he would start sating "cahr, cahr" And he ate pizza, and ravioli, and mozzarella sticks. It was the biggest meal he's ever had. And if you consider that he had half a Klondike bar an hour or so earlier. It was impressive!

Anyway I just wanted to remember this day, because it is the culmination of a wonderful summer with our amazing boy.

Now I am off to work on the new sock I am knitting... More about that later. Have a great week.

2009-08-04T21:12:00.003-04:00

Helper

My little helper and I had a photo shoot this afternoon for actual finished objects:

He also helped me by insisting on carrying the doggy poop bag after the dogs walk. He carried it up the street, into the house, out to the garage, and into the trash proclaiming "Peeeeh (U)"

He is just so darn cute that its (thankfully) hard to stay mad at him for all the little irascible things he does.

2009-07-30T20:41:00.001-04:00

Mommy Stuff

(This is a picture of the boy from earlier in the summer. We went strawberry picking, and saw farm animals. I wrote this blurb shortly after mother's day and wasn't sure if I would publish it, but here goes... I will try to write more about this later)

I think I’m going through a sort of midlife crisis. My fellowship ends next February, so I’ve been weighing things, trying to figure out who I am, and where I want to be. I haven’t though this introspectively about my life since the unhappy period in my life that was high school.

There are many things that my mind is trying to balance at once while I figure this out. Being mommy, wanting another, the economy, my husband’s career, my career (such that it is), what I want to do, what I should do, what I could do… It’s really a lot for my analytical brain to handle.

What I want to do? After a little over 1 year back from my maternity leave, I want to stay home with the boy. I’ve wrestled with this a lot, and when I became a mother 17 months ago, I didn’t think I would feel this way. Rather, I didn’t let myself acknowledge that there was a possibility I would feel this way.

At the end of my maternity leave I was ready to go back. No, I was determined to go back.But it was the crushing routine, of pumping (four times a day), getting everything ready for daycare, dropping off, going to work where I couldn’t get any traction on my projects, leaving at 5:00 to pick up the pooh, and then coming home, washing baby dishes, going to sleep. Restart next day.

It was hard. I swore every day, when I walked from my car to the building where I work with tears in my eyes, I would never do it this way again.I will say that things got better. No pumping anymore. The boy mostly sleeps well. I am well rested. I finally got my research moving forward.

But now I feel hopelessly divided. I can’t put the time in at the lab to do everything that I should be doing. I have to prioritizes, and this means making good guesses, and leaving lots of loose ends. I can feel the project coming together into a paper, but I’m not sure anyone other than me cares about the phenomena I’m studying, so I’m not sure how well such a paper will be received. I’m making it work, but just barely.

And then there is the boy. He is growing up and doing amazing things. And it is happening so goddamn fast! And we struggle to take him to the park on the weekend ( the only time we have to do such things) because we are so busy with errands, and tired. And this bothers me. I don’t like feeling divided, and I don’t like short changing my kid.

So you see where I’m coming from. I build my career around my life, not the other way around. For awhile I want to stay home. Try my hand at teaching as an adjunct so I’m doing something to keep moving forward, or sideways, but hopefully not backward. But then there are the other two questions. Should I do this? A one paycheck household scares me, especially these days. Is this the right thing for Sean. He likes daycare, and being around other kids. And the more dubious one, Can I do this?

2009-07-13T20:31:00.001-04:00

More Socks......

These are Dead Simple Lace Socks from Wendy Johnson's book, "Socks from the Toe-Up" or something like that. (I need to remeber how to do links, like a good blogger). For some reason this sock looks way better in this photo, than it does in real life. It usually doesn't work out way. The yarn is Socks that Rock Nyame, which I refer to (in my head) as Nynaeve because I am reading Robert Jordan this summer. I am quite enjoying the Robert Jordan, that is why I knit so slow. It's either read for an hour, or knit, and most nights I read.

2009-07-06T21:04:00.002-04:00

Happy 4th (belated of course)

"Little boys are just little dudes, aren't they?" mother of 6 year old girl at the pool.

When did he start being a little boy?

2009-06-22T20:24:00.002-04:00

Socks part II

I finished these about a month ago. They are better than my first pair: A little snuggier, and the yarn doesn't seem to be as prone to balling (there is a proper term for what I'm trying to say, but I just can't remeber it). Yeah! I can knit a pair of socks in the summer, that I can't wear until mid-October at the earliest.

Another pair of Socks has been started. Actually I finished the first of that pair, but more on that later. Also more on the fascinating adventures of one 18 month old little boy.

2009-04-26T11:57:00.003-04:00

ZOO!

2009-04-17T21:38:00.000-04:00

New sock well underway. Just hope there's enough yarn for two.

2009-04-13T20:34:00.003-04:00

Accomplishments

The boy walks! And he likes to help out around the house.

The evil socks are done.

Anna's sweater needs only four buttons.

And a new pair of socks are underway, but more on that later....

2009-03-01T11:18:00.003-05:00

Evil Sock

I had a knitters moment last night. I've been steadfastly working on the above pictured sock. It is a standard normal sock with short-row heel and short-row toe. It looks pretty innocent doesn't it?

I have felt for awhile that my knitting resume is deficient in sock knitting, so I set out to knit a simple sock that would fit my foot. You see most of the socks I have knit come out large and are comfy but somewhat dangerous on hardwood floors.

So i picked out this very simple pattern with the short-row heel and toe thrown in because I wanted to learn how to make a sock this way, and because I thought it might be better fitting than your standard gusset and picked up stiches sock. And I think this was a good deciscion.

Nevermind that I knit the heel three times last weekend to get it perfect. Nevermind that I basically did the same thing with the toe because I kept forgetting a stitch after I turned the toe, and again I wanted to get it right

As I closed the toe to the foot with a zigzag bind-off and I was all but three stiches from the end, disater struck. I didn't notice when it happened. It was 11:00 at night. I stayed up to finish the sock. I finished it and looked at it, and was pretty happy, until I noticed the dropped stich about three stiches from the end.

I thought, well I'll just rip it back and reclose. Except when I went to rip it back the yarn caught on itself and was really being stuborn. So in a fit of frustration I did what any crazied and tearful knitter would do. I took scissors to the toe. And as I tried to get clear of the mess that creates, the yarn kept catch and I couldn't get clear of the tangle. At this point I went downstairs to my husband who was really as understanding as any non-knitter could be about these things. He said some things that where all very sensical. The sock had been into the garbage about three or four times at this point. I kept saying its not salvagable. He kept saying put it away and look at it tommorrow. Eventually I grabbed a bottle of wine from the pantry, poured a glass for me and my husband , and I put the sock away.

Of course the baby and I had a competition to see who was more cranky this morning ( I think I won hands down, I don't sleep well when a drink, even a little and I wasn't ready to get up at 6:00 with a screaming 15 month old). But we have since recovered. Groceries have been bought. He is know napping and the sock minus the toe and an inch or so of the foot has been salvaged. It is still an evil sock. And to think I need to knit a second one. Maybe I should stick to sweaters!

2009-01-25T21:10:00.004-05:00

Finished Green Sweater, and The Allergist

So it might have taken me the time it took me to gestate the model, but the green sweater (Trellis) is finished and functional. I finally got a chance to get the boy outside for his photo shoot. Isn't he an excellent model!

I'm pretty happy with it, the sleeves are a bit long, which doesn't bother me because I can just role them up, and it isn't quite as roomy as I would expect an 18 month sweater to by on my little guy, but it is finished, and even has nice wooden buttons.

However, in what a consider a great twist of irony, the night after I finished sewing the buttons on, I took the little guy to an allergist to look into the excema rash (which isn't very apparent in this picture, but probably is in some of older posts) that is on his cheeks and has been there since he was four months old. As we hit the colder months it started getting worse and worse, and we decided it was time to see if it was being caused by a detecable allergy to something. The Allergist recommend a dozen things to get the rash under control, and sent us on a treasure hunt all over town to find good lotions. But amoung the recomendations was to avoid clothing of any other material other than 100% cotton. Being that I knit everybody else's babies things in at least a cotton blend so as not to be irritating, I find it a little ironic that I knit this in wool, it took so long, and I put so much love and care to making it nice, and now little guy can't even wear it! Ah well, Thems the Breaks! I'm sure Anna will like it next year.

2009-01-08T22:11:00.002-05:00

A sweater for Anna Lucy

Harvey Kimono sweater (the girlie version) from "Natural Knits"

in green apple shine sport weight (a somewhat unatural yarn, but it should be non-allergenic and machine washable which are big pluses for baby sweaters)

knit on #4 knitpicks harmony needles, and #3 whatever they call their metal needles

This is the 3rd or 4th baby sweater I've knit in this yarn. I like it for the above mentioned reasons, but I'm not thrilled with how it feels on the needles. It's pretty slippery, especially on the metal ones. Thank goodness I got gauge with that size 4, harmony needle that are wood, and all I have to knit with the metal is the picot edge and a little bit of cuff.

Not to scoop my sister, but she did take my name afterall, but this sweater is for a very special little girl who I'm looking forward to getting to know better.

Welcome to the world, little one! You have a great family to take care of you .

There might be even a slight chance that one day she will ask me to teach her to knit (which I don't think my son, or my nephew, or my other niece for that matter ever will, but who knows they might suprise me). I hold out great hope for this one. I should do that whole holding the knitting needles thing with her. Too bad I'm not a better knitter

2009-01-04T21:15:00.003-05:00

We Survived Holiday '08!

Last year the holidays passed in the blurr of having a 1-month old. I remeber everyone coming to us, and eating some kind of dinner, and holding the little guy who slept most of the time. And somehow presents were exchanged, but it was basically a blurr to my sleep deprived mind, but a pleasant one.

This year was rough. It was important to me to start observing the holidays a little bit, so we got a tree (and put all four ornaments on it). And we did the family thing at my parents which was fun. I did eventually finish the little guy's sweater. And a was looking forward to a little time off work, and letting my husband take care of the little guy a little bit, so I could do something unheard of like knit during daylight hours, and maybe I would get to go out somewhere by myself.

Unfourtunately, I had two bouts of a stomach virus one a week before Christmas, and one, that everybody got, starting with the little guy, over the New Year's Holiday. I guess this is just one of the things you expect with a kid in daycare, but I sort of feel a little ripped off about the Holiday thing. I mean I'm really glad nobody was sick on the actually Christmas day, but I've been dealing with a cranky kid all weekend, and I'm tired from being sick myself. I don't feel at all rested, I had to take two days off of work I wasn't expecting to (and can ill afford), and I didn't get time to myself,and I don't see much prospect for that in the near future.

I know I shouldn't be complaining too much. I have alot to be thankful for, and I know there are alot of people out there in that world who were suffering a lot more than me over this holiday, but I'm a little crabby.

However, tommorrow is the start of a new week, and the start of a new life (well, probably more than one, but at least one I know of). Good luck big sister, I hope everything goes smoothly tommorrow, and hopefully sometime this week I will get to visit you guys and welcome my new niece. And if that isn't something to be happy about, I don't know what is!

2008-12-24T22:24:00.001-05:00

Knitting done. Tree is up. Presents mostly wrapped.The Festivities may begin.

Merry Christmas Everybody!

2008-12-19T13:19:00.004-05:00

One Year Old

Last year (roughly-speaking)

This year

Everything else in between seems like a blurr.

2008-12-19T13:01:00.002-05:00

Determination meets a stomach virus.... The sweater is probably not getting done on time. I might get the sleeve knit by the 25th, but probably not sewn together until after the holidays.

I am recovering, and am still keeping my fingers crossed that nobody else in the family gets it, whatever it was...

I really could have gone for some chef-boy-ardee ravioli, but all we had was lousy Healhty request chicken soup. It's really not that good.

We will still get a tree.....

2008-12-14T20:02:00.004-05:00

'Tis the season.....

I am determined to get this finished before December 25th:

That is Trellis. The Trellis I've been working on for months. I have a back, a left front, a right front, and one sleeve. I need to complete the second sleeve and do the finishing in 1 week and 1/2. Every part of this sweater has been re-knit at least partially, except right front. I even had two sleeves completed at one point, but after looking at the pattern, and thinking , and re-measuring, I decided the gauge was too far off, and I ripped them out. This is a new way of thinking about knitting for me. I don't want to fudge things. If I'm going to take the time to knit it, it is going to be look nice, even if it takes me nine months to knit a baby sweater!

I fully realize that December 25th is a arbitrary deadline for a present for one who will not even notice the sweater or care about it except to fuss when it is put on him, but I sort of like the excitement of knitting it for Sean's 2nd Christmas. I want to anticipate the season by knitting a sweater.

I also want a tree. Probably a fake one, b/c our dog would probably pee on a real one, but I want a tree with lights, so you can turn off the lights in the room and sit in the tree light and feel the magic of the season, and forget all the hustle, and stress of it. I realize that it might be a hastle (not to mention inherently dangerous) with a one year old who is learning to stand up and is getting quicker and more determined to test us each day. But I want the tree, It's part of my past and traditions that I want to be there for my kids even if we are pressed for time this time of year.

As of yet, we have not had the time to go out and get a tree, but maybe next weekend. Most of the Christmas shopping is done. The cards are made and have arrived at home, and are just waiting addresses and stamps. They should be mailed out this week, so we should be able to do it next weekend. Probably just as well to have it up for a shorter time.

I leave you with a picture of Sean at the park. He turned 1, a couple of weeks ago. I can't believe how quickly his first year went by. Simply amazing.

2008-11-11T10:38:00.004-05:00

What the hell, Happy belated Halloween! And Happy Veterans Day too!!

We aren't exactly on the ball with these things, but this is the best we can do. Sean looked very cute in his Japanese tiger outfit. We especially liked the tail. There has been lots of stuff going on around here; bathroon remodeling, career decisions being made, trips to NJ, several books finished,baby wrangling, and yes, knitting, but more on all that later.

2008-10-18T21:16:00.004-04:00

ZOO!

Well what does a baby do on a bright and beautiful Columbus day, when daycare is closed?

You have mommy call up your friend's mommy and you head out to the Zoo!

We saw elephants and little hippos and maybe some other animals, and hung out with the stroller set who were at the zoo en force.

And then we took a nap because it was just too exciting!

2008-10-13T10:57:00.003-04:00

Visitors

Over the last week we had visitors from the otherside of the world. My brother and his wife visited from Tokyo, and we had a barbeque bash at our house with so many people we used every last one of my plates and didn't have any knives left over. 10 people, I guess our family has gotten a little bit bigger.

His Uncle made quite an impression of OLG. And everybody seemded happy to be together as a family for once. Football was watched, Food was eaten, and A good time was had by all (except the dog who got locked upstairs).

OLG pulled himself to standing for the first time this weekend too. He is growing up so fast.

2008-09-14T16:20:00.006-04:00

Beach '08

The first week in September was our annual trip to Duck, NC. As usually we had lovely weather, at least the first four days. Then Hannah decided to stop by on her way through, and we decided it was the end of the week and we'd rather be stuck inside at home then in our beach house.

Our little boy has a pretty good time. Actually I'm not really sure he appreciated the change in his routine, but he hung in there pretty good. He is know an expert tummy crawler, and is getting all over the place. He is also able to pick up cheerios with the dreaded pincer grasp. He has a little trouble with the hand mouth exchange part though. He really wanted to eat the sand, but I couldn't let him. I think he liked the walks in the Duck on the bike path the best, and hanging out with mommy and daddy for an entire week.

I'm still worried about his eating habits. He had his 9 month visit and he has dropped to 5th percentile in weight and height. But, the doc isn't worried yet because they're matched to one another. I started to cry when he was weighed in. It's hard not to take these things personally because of all the effort I've put into breastfeeding him over these last 9 months. He seems to be interested in eating a bigger variety of things now, but still only in small quantites. Anyway we will do what we can, and hopefully he'll start making progress.

2008-08-03T11:09:00.005-04:00

Chicken Soup in August

I've been thinking that there is alot I should be recording on this here blogs. Having a small wee one around is nothing if not an experience which causes one to think alot. The thing is things are moving so fast, and honestly blogging isn't exactly my top priority, its pretty far down on the list of things to do....

First example of things moving fast, Baby sits on his own, and has been doing this well for about a month. He is actually making his first forays into crawling, sortof a commando style on the stomach leaning and reaching to one side. It's slow and he gets frustrated, but I think this means we need to baby proof the house soon...

Second example: We've started introducing solids. We are now making up for the ease with which we got the breast feeding thing down, and are dealing with a very opinionated baby. He eats about four things, maybe five on a good day. Mostly the gerber applesauce, pear sauce, squash, and fresh peaches and necatarines:

Thing is, he doesn't like much else. Maybe a few spoonfuls of peas or sweet potatoe if you also give him some applesaue. He won't even eat applesauce I make for him. So this is the reason I'm making some chicken soup... I think it might be time to try something new.

2008-07-26T21:32:00.000-04:00

2008-06-15T13:47:00.002-04:00

Excersaucer

For his 6 month birthday, we put together The Excersaucer, which he really seems to get a kick out of.

2008-05-24T10:41:00.004-04:00

About 6 months

Our Little Guy turns about 6 months sometime very soon, and as you can see he's starting to look like a little boy and less like an infant. It is amazing how fast he is growing. He is in the I like to roll over on to my stomach, and then start screaming until mommy puts me on my back b/c I haven't quite figured out the whole getting back thing phase. We are working on the whole sitting up phase thing, but he doesn't quite understand the concept of balance yet. It might be awhile.

A little bit of an updated is probably in order as it's been awhile. OLG is a very happy baby as you can see from the above picture. (Please ignore the crazy woman holding him, and instead focus on the cuteness). We did go through a little bit of a sleep problem around 4 1/2 months where due to a series of colds, and mom over-reacting to said colds, Sean developed the unfortunate habit of waking up every 1-2 hours at night, resulting in "reactionary co-sleeping" and a mommy who was dragging herself into work each looking a bit bedraggled. This went on for a month (a month of mom sleeping in 1-2 hour shifts, and then getting up at 6:30 and having to be somewhat functional at work all day, think about it.....)Then Fabulous Aunt Aimee gave us their copy of the Sleeplady book, and it inspired us to get that kid back in his crib, and back to sleeping. Basically, after one rough night OLG figured out how to fall asleep by himself (we'll mostly by himself), and now sleeps in his crib in the other room. He still wakes up more frequently then he should, but we usually get at least on 6-8 hour stretch out of him. The sad thing is that we now put him to bed around 8:30, which means precious little family time on weekdays. Being a working parent is rough!!

So event wise, We went to cherry blossoms with the lab:

We went for two nights of passover in NJ and saw all the cousins. Good food, good people. Thanks Nanna...

We went to Md Sheep and Wool and lasted about 45 minutes before baby got hungry, but decided that too much was going on to nurse. So we left after looking at a couple of baa,baas, and went back to his comfy nursing chair at home where he settled down. I now try to take a bottle with me when we go out. He seems to take a bottle in social situations much better than me. So much for the ease of breastfeeding on the go! By the way my husband was absolutely stunned by the size of the sheep in wool thing, he though there'd be a handful of people, even though I tried to warn him.

We went out to The Old Olney Alehouse with friends, sat outside and had dinner and I drank my first draft beer in a long time. So nice to sit outside , eat, and drink a beer with the baby

There was mother's day. I got pretty flowers, and we had a nice brunch at Fabulous Aunt Aimee's. I'll see if I can steal one of her pictures.

Dad has started to play Thurs evening golf, leaving me to wonder what fun activity I could do to cash in all the baby "capital" I'm earning.

And, oh yeah, knitting: I completed one sleeve of "Trellis" for OLG when he is about 18 months. I might be able to finish the sweater in time.. I started Airsaig (middle), and have decided that it is way overly ambitious of a project for the time being, although a really digg the yarn color, and I like knitting lace, so I'm planning on tucking it into my stash for latter, and re-started a clapotis (right) from MdSW yarn purchase two years ago. I had started this before, and was actually quite far into it, but I remember some wonkiness, so I decided to rip out and start again. Maybe, I can finish this in time for Christmas giving. It's hard to find time to myself these days to knit, but I do try.

Alright that is all for now. I will be sending this link out to some friends and relatives shortly, so that we are not out done by cousin Sam, so Hello! if I actually manage to do that before the next post!

2008-03-15T09:00:00.002-04:00

Can't resist the cuteness

2008-03-01T13:26:00.004-05:00

While baby .....

Just taking a quiet moment for an update. This is the aforementioned knitting entry. I started back to work, and baby has started daycare. So far, so good, but I'm exhausted. Before ending my maternity leave I managed to finish up some projects for Sean and his buddy Roi. (See I'm not such a neglectful knitmom afterall!)

Project one: Baby pea-pod sweater, available on-line from Interweave knits.

Project two: Red vest from "Nature knits".

Project three: Tan sweater from "baby knits" from Debbie Bliss

And i've started a new project:

2008-01-30T11:18:00.000-05:00

6 hours of sleep and other stuff

One of the first times I got 6 hours of consecutive sleep, left me feeling so great, I was able to assemble the 40 some odd parts of my brother's awesome gift inbetween feeding and fussy time the next day. My husband then came home from work and checked all the screws to make sure they were tight enough, you know just to be safe.

I've been getting a 4-6 hr stretch most nights, and then 2 more in the morning once I resettle him. I think this is really good, I just wonder if it will hold when he goes to daycare.

Baby has really become fascinated with putting his fist in his mouth. He is also starting to interact with us in different ways. Smiles when we make funny animal noises, or opens his eyes up really wide when we talk to him. He is starting to make little noises of excitement too, but no laughs yet.

Lastly, we went over to my sister's house and just look at my nephews keen fashion sense. Notice the knit cap, which was a hat I knit for him when he wasn't even born yet.

Next time, maybe some current knitting content???

2008-01-09T14:14:00.000-05:00

Baby, a photo essay

Typing one handed is rough! I can't believe we are at 6 weeks! It is still weird that we have a baby.

2007-12-06T15:16:00.000-05:00

2007-12-04T11:47:00.000-05:00

The Wait is Over

Weighing in at 7 lbs. 11 oz, and 21 inches, the little one has arrived!
Mom and Dad couldn't be prouder. We love our little guy.

2007-11-25T10:51:00.001-05:00

Waiting......

2007-11-10T08:29:00.000-05:00

Nesting

We are full-term, and the anxiety I was feeling the last couple of weeks has lifted! I am getting pretty darn big and am beginning to wonder just exactly how big this baby's going to be.

The past two weeks I have been hectic ones around our house. It started with a shower, hosted by my lovely sister (shower at sister's) where my family was very generous to us in helping get ready to welcome baby. Here's a picture of some of the loot, which was hastily thrown into a closet on cleaning lady day:

Then there was a party at our house with friends, the pre-baby annual fall party which was fun, but exhausting. Sorry, I didn't take any picks.

Then the fun began, a faucet broke. We called a plumber, who sortof fixed it. Then J.C. did something to it again while trying to fix it (I was sitting on the couch and heard a geyser type sound followed by some swearing. I didn't ask), and we had our handy friend come over and put in a new one (Thanks handy friend). J.C. cut his finger and broke a blind for the baby's room. It was a bad week for the dad to be.

This was all leading up to the big event Saturday, good-bye ratty 20 year old carpeting that smelled like cat pee in places. Hello new floors. Who does this when they are 36 weeks and counting? That's right, we do.... And somehow we survived, and the floors and the new carpeting got in. There was the minor inconvenience of the installation guys thinking they didn't have enough carpet (yes, we do have large closets, and yes, we did give you those measurements), and finally running out of hardwoods ( and realizing this after they had taken the toilet out of the half bath downstairs). But they came back Tuesday, forcing me to take an afternoon off of work (thank goodness I don't have a real job), and the house is much improved:

The rest of the week J.C. spent putting together furniture for baby's room. This was also not without it travails. One of the drawers on the changing table was not drilled, and the crib seemed to require super human strength to put together. But mostly this to seems to be getting done.

While husband did all his getting the house ready stuff, I sort of sat around feeling not very helpful. I went shopping with a friend while the floor guys were there Saturday. And during the week I washed a lot of baby stuff. Is our baby really going to be that small?

So now what's left? Assembly some shower gifts, and put the damn car seats in the car. Wish us luck with that..... We might actually get them in before I'm in the hospital.

And since it got cold, I started to knit the baby a hat. He can't arrive before I finish it, right?

2007-10-27T09:57:00.000-04:00

Getting to Me

So for the most part I've had it pretty easy being pregnant. Little morning sickness, haven't felt too weird about gaining weight, there was the bad heartburn I was having for awhile but that went away, and there was the ankle thing.... But basically not too bad.

However, I just crossed the 35 week, and it's starting to get to me, and it wasn't what I expected (you know, the usually physical complaints), but the mental aspect. Nobody warned me about this. I am becoming a neurotic and perhaps hysterical at times, expectant mother. I find myself crying about once a day because I'm worried. Not about the approaching labour process, but about the baby. Is he moving enough, have I done everything I could to make sure he is healthy, have I payed enough attention to my body to know if there was a problem, have I had the right discussions with my doctor. The thing that makes it worse is that I'm completely aware that I am being completely irrational. And I dislike this feeling so much that I'm looking forward to going through labour, so that I can have the baby on the outside where I can check to see if he is breathing, and thriving, even if it means going through labour and having a baby to take care of, and giving up my beloved sleep. It's got to be a little easier than this madness.

5 more weeks!!!!

2007-10-12T07:57:00.000-04:00

Time is speeding up

It's been so long, that I don't remeber any of the html or the what I called the little special elements I created for headings and such . At some point I will look it up, but for now just typing something is probably all one can hope for.

We've been busy, and I feel like I'm just trying to get to November, because I've decided that November must be a chill month. I mean I'm going to be 9th months pregnant. Yikes!!!! I still have problems beleiving that I'm actually having a baby, even though there ample evidence. He's moving around right now actually.

I'm really excited about having the baby, but its hard to let myself get too excited. I guess I'm the don't count you chickens type, and I don't want to get too excited for fear that something might go wrong. I'm already really in love with the little guy, and I'm a little scared about that too.

To recap what is going on, we went to the beach in the beginning of September to hang out and relax. After that there has been painting of the baby's room, other work around the house, shopping, baby classes, and doctor's appointments. Somehow I also try to do some work.

This week I've felt particularly pregnant (33 weeks). I keep dropping things. I actually threw up because of my prenatal vitamin. Baby's been moving around alot and with more force then before (which is nice, I like to know he's getting stronger). I'm starting to outgrow some of the maternity clothes. I mysteriously hurt my ankle, so in addition to being big and cumbersome, I've been hobbling around. (It is starting to feel better by the way.) I've also been working on a talk, which is depressing because I feel like I've done nothing over the last year since I gave my talk last year.

Anyway that's how things are. Knitting progress is slow because I need to read the directions and I don't feel like it. I've been working on my crocheted blanket. It's really wide, and will take me years to complete, but doesn't really require a lot of thought.

I need to go walk the dog, maybe I'll post some pictures some other time.

2007-08-04T12:38:00.001-04:00

We are still around....

Apparently it was still spring when I last sat down and wrote one of these little bloggy things. Now it is fully the dog days of August in D.C.; hot, humid,
and dry. I hope our lawn survives okay, I feel a little guilty about watering it, even at night. A big tree up the street from us died because of the drouhgt. If their water column breaks they are done for. Poor tree... poor homeowner who now needs to have the giant tree cut down....

There's actually been quite a lot going on around these parts over the last five months, so I will quickly update, in no particular chronological order.

Finished peapod sweater:

another view

Working on a red vest sweater, for a baby, (pattern from "natural knits, for Babies and Moms" by Louisa Harding, knit in Shine Sport)

Went to a small scientific meeting in Italy, where quite a few people were talking about my paper, which is weird because at larger, less focused meetings nobody generally cares about this stuff. Picture of Italy at flickr sight

Bought a shiny used 1971 Yamah U1 piano. Has a very nice sound, and doesn't have problems turning on and off. Still haven't figured out what to do with the old electric piano which was a nice idea in principal, but would strongly urge anyone thinking about buying one to consider a used real piano instead.

Seriously thinking about writing a K grant, mulling over ideas which will take a lot of work to flesh out

And lastly, but certainly no leastly...

Started working on producing another human being, about four more months to go:

Me at 21 weeks:

Baby at 20 weeks:

2007-04-23T18:49:00.000-04:00

A Couch Needs a Blanket

Inspired by others, and our new blank canvas IKEA couch, I have started a very simple project: Double crochet striped blanket. I also decided this would be the oppurtunity to get rid rid of some of the nasty acrylic yarn hanging around the bottom of my yarn chest. I don't mind using acrylic for a blanket, because it is cheap, durable, doesn't itch that much, and with double crochet you don't exactly have to worry about uneven stitches like you do with straight untextured knitting.

The only thing is, as I got thinking about this project I decided that the few colors of acrylic yarn I had weren't going to cut. I probably didn't have enough material. Then I went to the local craft store and became mesmerized by the color options and the cheapness, and bought something like eight skeins of crappy yarn. It seems that instead of getting rid of the crappy yarn it has instead multiplied.

Alas....What's a girl to do? If it makes my blanket cool, it's worth it.

2007-04-15T21:44:00.000-04:00

New project for the baby boom. Pea Pod sweater from Interweave knits available for free on their web page. These baby sweaters make me realize that sometime plain old straight knitting is all I want to do.

2007-04-08T21:48:00.000-04:00

Finished Object 2007

The orange baby sweater was finished last weekend, in time for Jen and Matt's baby shower.

It turns out the sweater matches the running stroller we donated money to get them.

It did pretty good with the ends, and the seams and like. Also it is a very quick knit, took me two weeks, with most of the knitting accomplished in week one.

Hippo models:

2007-03-25T09:26:00.000-04:00

See, I really did finish the knitting of this sweater. I'm even working on the ends

2007-03-19T07:44:00.000-04:00

Quick Morning Update

A. My paper has been excepted at MBC, soon to be in press!!!!!! (I heard saturday and did a little dance in my kitchen)

B. I finished knitting and seaming the baby kimono sweater.
(pictures as soon as I charge my camera batteries

C. I had a carrot soup catastrophe, involving a random accident and me not completely understanding the limitations of my cuisnart. (Upshot is that my husband has agreed to get me the kitchenaid blender I have been coveting for at least five years

That's all for now. Have a good Monday!